Uprooting the ‘I’m not good enough’ belief
How does the belief 'I’m not good enough' show up in your life? I’ve had my own struggle with self-sabotaging behaviours lately, so my #thursdaytherapy this week was all about how hidden negative beliefs show up - and what to do to dissolve them.
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Or here’s the quick readable version...
Negative self-beliefs inhibit progress in all areas of your life
Sometimes we’re aware of our self-sabotaging, negative self-beliefs - while others are lurking beneath the surface and we don’t even know we’re carrying them around.
Unfortunately, it’s actually the hidden beliefs that drive your choices, decisions and behaviour even more than those you are consciously aware of.
Do you see yourself clearly?
Despite being a Therapist and all the work I’ve done on myself, I discovered recently that I had a hidden belief which was really holding me back.
I wanted to do more marketing and put myself out there so I can help more people - but something was stopping me.
So I used my belief mapping technique, and it emerged I had a hidden belief that online marketing is evil!
The origins of this belief were deeply rooted in my childhood - when online marketing didn’t even exist! - but the emotion and the memory connected to the past had worked its way up through my psyche and this is how it manifested in my life.
Negative self-beliefs and self-sabotaging behaviours show up in unexpected ways. So you can’t use your intellect to work out what’s hiding beneath the surface.
Your beliefs are like layers of the earth
The surface is a varied landscape of mountains, beaches and deserts. This is how your beliefs show up in your life, e.g staying in a job you hate or a miserable relationship, not learning to drive, not traveling, not pursuing your talents, pushing yourself really hard at work, never allowing yourself time to relax, criticizing yourself, or people pleasing.
The next layer down is sediment and rock - the layer beneath the surface where all of your hidden beliefs are located.
Then buried deep down in the core is the belief of “I am not good enough” (pretty much everyone has this!).
In the centre is a molten layer of pure emotion...
Fear: the root emotion of ‘I’m not good enough’
Fear affects every area of our life: health, relationships, work, parenting, how we show up in our businesses.
It starts in childhood and evolves into a complex structure woven into the fabric of our thoughts and personality.
And it will keep showing up in your life, stopping you from finding the happiness and success you want, and repeating the same self-sabotaging behaviours - unless you resolve it.
Dissolving the fear
The solution is obvious: Find out what your negative self-beliefs are, clear and resolve them and naturally all of the happiness, contentment, freedom and meaning you want will be yours.
This is what I do - with my clients and for myself. Up until now, I have only ever done this with my 1:1 clients, normally over a period of at least 3 months.